Fetish is an umbrella term to protect a desire from a down pour of possible judgement and ridicule.
And, there is a lesser known definition that is rather exquisite and inspiring.
I’m by far an expert on the topic, I don't have any fetishes that I know of,
and there is plenty of time yet to discover. My experience has been mostly from the bleachers, watching a few “Real Sex” reals from the HBO Classic series. One of my favorites was a segment on the fetish of food.
It looked like any other potluck, patrons walking in with banquet size bowls of delicacies and classics you might find at a family reunion...
macaroni and cheese,
— a feast.
Once the room was covered in plastic drop clothes, the participants got naked for an epic food fight.
It was astonishing, in the best sort of way.
I was sitting there on my couch with twinges of jealousy.
Everyone was slipping, sliding and smearing food all over each other to a soundtrack of laughter.
Suddenly I found myself hungry,
Not to eat, but to play along.
I have dipped my toe into fetish culture once — literally.
A very new friend sheepishly revealed that he had a foot fetish. I didn't quite know what to do with the disclosure. My thoughts went to Paul Bundy and Married with Children...
Shoe salesman always being easy targets for fetish slander.
The friend asked if he could suck my toes. I had no idea what to expect, frankly the thought of having toes in my mouth never really got my appetite growling.
I was afraid it would tickle too much to take it seriously.
And, it was a day I felt the spark of my adventurous spirit,
So I said, “Yes.”
I was mighty surprised by the pleasure.
Tongue between toes is a delicacy.
My arches molded around his hairline.
I impressed myself by how much I allowed myself to be in joy.
Suddenly my big toe was acting all dominate and feisty;
A part of my body was getting to play a whole new game.
The most thrilling part was witnessing this man in so much delight,
And his clothes never came off.
It was absolutely fascinating and erotic to see someone in their glory
In such a simple way.
Another lesser known but exception definition of Fetish...
“ an inanimate object worshiped for its supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabited by a spirit.”
I will say that my feet have never felt so alive.
Whether they considered it their favorite fashion of play,
Or perhaps something more holy,
I would highly consider reverently placing them before someone again.
If you happen find yourself frightened by your (or another's) fetish
wondering if you even have any,
or still figuring out what turns you on in the most deliciously vanilla flavored ways...
I want to pass one thing I’ve picked up along the way,
And one I just made up
To prop open the doors, and keep shame from walking in.
“If you’ve thought about it, it exists.”
I heard this from a woman highlighted on a podcast doing amazing work with sex education in high schools (if I remembered her name, I’d share it). She shared a big part of her job is emptying buckets of embarrassment and ensuring kids that something isn’t fundamentally wrong with them. She designed an incredible system of empowering kids with accurate, modern sex-ed, and in a tongue-and-cheek moment she incapsulated the simple advice, “You’re not weird, Google it, you’ll find it.”
Oh, the wonders of the world wide web to let you know you’re not alone.
My two cents to add...
Don’t stop your search at human behavior,
Take a look at other animals
And be prepared to be dazzled, entertained, and maybe a little turned on
— it happened to me with a lobster.
Seriously, if for some reason you are ever embarrassed,
Look at the sexual behaviors of camels, rainforest birds, or dolphins to name a few.
People might say, “You’re an Animal” as if to insult.
And you are, part of the Animal Kingdom.
You can thank them for reminding you that you belong.
Mating is normal, it’s part of life.
As humans, we have the extra special wiring
To frolic for play, pleasure, or celebrate the divine.
My mind just dashed to the best of both worlds,
Foot fetish at a food fight.
From my very limited experience, I can only imagine that would be